Sadly, A Duck is a Duck

It always seems to save time in an SL relationship if in the early..getting to know you phase, you mention what you are looking for in an SL partner. Well, let’s not use that partner word, let’s just call it lover.

Three nights ago I meet a very nice gentleman. I think he was pretty clear about what he wanted.

• Don’t fall in love
• He would rather mix SL and RL
• He does not do exclusive
• He doesn’t care for southern women

Also

He has left broken hearts behind him because the women were way more emotionally involved than he was. He finds if he is a bit difficult from the beginning with the ladies, they won’t fall too deeply for him. Yup..he said that!

Ok – he was being a good communicator. I am a firm supporter of the theory “If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, looks like a duck….it’s a duck”. But oddly enough I liked him and wanted to hear back from him. He made me smile.

Our second conversation the next day also went well..so well, that I lost track of the time.

Third encounter – a slow dance. Ok, so I flirted a little. He did not react well. Well, that’s not true. He didn’t react at all. No whispers, no touching. Hmm….something was off. Then he says it.

He wanted me to admit that I was cheating on my RL husband by being on SL. If not physically, then emotionally. This from a man who knows nothing about my RL, very happy marriage. I stood there like an idiot on the dance ball and let him lecture me. Because, as a southern woman, I didn’t want to be rude. When he was done. I was ALMOST speechless. But I did tell him he was not the one to judge me or my marriage. Then said goodbye.

So what am I looking for in a SL relationship?

• A friend, and if someday that friend becomes a lover, we all win.
• SL stays in SL.
• I do exclusive. *If he requests it. During the "just friendship" thing, of course he does not have to be exclusive

Apparently many men in SL don't care if a woman has multiple lovers. But me? I don't mind if the guy is a little possessive. In fact it can be very sexy.

I would never cheat on a man in SL anymore than I would cheat on my husband in RL. I like a man who knows what he wants. If he has multiple lovers in SL…he has not found the right lover. He has not cared enough about one woman that he would walk away from all the others. No, SL is not a lifetime commitment, no one expects it to be. But for a few weeks or months in this place, well, I'm sure you get the idea.

MEN!

What a great weekend!

I did build 2 beautiful leather chairs, a sideboard and a round shelf - I'll put in the pretty pictures in a day or 2.

So....after all that work i dressed up to go dancing. I am embarrassed to admit I am one of those folks who sits on the side at the ballroom, waiting for someone to ask me to dance. I rarely get asked. But it does give me time to look at all the funny profiles.

Part of my problem is that I tend to be shy about some things and have a very difficult time making the first move.

Anyway, this past weekend I added 5 more links (mostly dance places). Keep in mind...I don't add just any dance place. It has to have great music (no Carpenter's stuff), great atmosphere and great company.

The 1 link that surprised me was Runaround Sue's, a retro 50's sock hop sort of place. A simple dance floor, great music, fun dance balls and it didn't have many people there. That meant no lag! Somehow because there was only me and one other person there...i could be a little less shy. Now I have a place to wear all my retro dresses!

BTW - Funny yelling griefers at Bogart's last night. They made me laugh!!

The Avi Princess

One upon a time..

There lived an avi with a romantic heart. She was way too naive for her own good. This avi fell for a very kind and patient male avi who had a past. His past was a bit shadowed due to his, shall we say, adventures.

Perhaps the adventurous male avi thought to himself..this one is different. He was good to her and made her smile.

When the gentleman decided to move on, he took a part of her with him. She waited, to see if he would look back, but he never did. She knew he would never return, but she was able to hold tight to the romance.

She made a quilt, lit a small fire and wondered...what really happened.

The Dark Side

I made a discovery in SL this past weekend. There may be 2 dark sides.

1. the odd, amusing, makes you stare with your mouth open while smiling with your eyes dark side.
2. the "What were they Thinking?" dark side. Not good, not comfortable dark side.

The links I have added are from #1. Mostly because I was too nervous to go look at the #2's. And of course I wouldn't want to scar anyone for life by slapping those links up there without a major warning.

So how did I find the links? Well actually I went to search and under places, typed blood. Then...I realized a grimmer dark side might be out there. Oh, I'm not talking about the vampire blood stuff, nope..I mean darker places. Really, I don't plan to visit the #'2 without a companion.

Anyway - I had a hoot with the fun (but bloody) places. Check them out!

On a positive note, as we get closer to Halloween, I will find lots more. I figure that way, you could have a nice Dark Side theme night.

















Haha - had to show this one of me tip toeing...minding my own business.
Dang! Right out of Scooby Doo!!

Eeek! I hear voices.

Well i did it. I turned the freaking mic on. Lolz - way too many "Can you hear me?" 's

Most uncomfortable feeling ever!! I unfortunately had a few technical problems with my set up, but it finally started working. I rarely expect to use it..really.

I suppose there will be that random guy who asks if i am really a woman and I'll flip it on for a few minutes. Personally, I think the guys just want to bump up to some RL contact and they use the guy thing as an excuse.

But then again..there could be a few male lesbians out there, maybe i should get the guy to flip on his mic for a sec.

Nawww, lesbians are too smart to play men in SL.

Now for the Fun Stuff

Well after spending waaayyy too long in the workshop, I decided to get dressed up and go to Phat Cat's. I rarely go there because it reminds me of a highschool football game. Have you noticed?

In high school the teenagers dress up and go to the game..to watch the game? nooo They wanted to be seen. To stroll. You know what I am talking about. The teenagers walking up and down the front isles checking each other out...yup, that's what they do.

So I went to Phat Cat's and what do I see? Sure, 8 couples dancing, BUT along the side are omg... way too many avi's just standing about checking each other out (eek!! strolling). Seriously! A few do have some nifty poses so they do look great (in a posing sort of way), but for goodness sake, ask each other to dance!! There are 79 dressed up folks wanting to hook up, but nooo..they want Mr. or Ms perfect to show up and sweep them off there little avi feet.

The nicest funniest people are there, say hello for goodness sake! Oh and although the photo is dark cuz of the midnight hour - take a look at the stroll:

Projects Too!

Well, I almost accomplished everything i wanted to this weekend.


On the left are:
Dining chairs by Tommi Parzinger U.S.A. 1950's

Love the backs of these chairs!! Notice not only the X's but take a look at the way the fabric is attached to the very dark wood. Beautiful, simple and elegant.




Below you will see one of this weekends projects! I love the colors on this one, but the reason the original chair caught my eye was the curve. The texture is a fine, dark red leather. This one has a sensual feel to it. Side Chair in the Style of Jacques Adnet, France, 1940's

Can You Hear Me?

Yay! I'ts Friday, time to make my weekend SL "to do" list.

• 3 new pieces of furniture
• Explore the Dark Side of Second Life (and add a few of these links next week)
• Use voice. Yes, I, Rachel Boram am about to be drug into Voice completely against my will.

Voice??

Yes, voice. Bet you can hear me sigh halfway across the country. I don't like the idea of voice. There are some things you just can't get across in voice. Typing gives you the freedom to NOT put your foot in your mouth quite as often or as quickly as voice will. Oh, and I am sooo not going to do voice sex. I could never say the things i feel free to type.

But -
1 - For business it is practical
2 - It gives me the opportunity to discreetly eavesdrop.
3 - My RL hubby has decided he wants to use it in SL (but not for sex). Hmmmm...

Oddly enough, Phillip and I don't play SL together. Philip is the love of my RL. He and I play SL separately and are both very happy with that arrangement (but that is another blog).

Anyway since lately someone hurt my feelings and thought I was a guy, i thought I would force my toes into the water. He never suggested voice and although he is no longer on my list and we are no longer in contact, it made me think. 95 % of my time will remain in typing and if this weekend freaks me out, that % will creep up.

Besides - how do you get a shy person to voice? Yup..I'm stressing. I wish this sort of thing was not so difficult for me.

Links and Stuff

To the right you will find all those pretty pink links. I wish I had the time to give detailed descriptions of each and every one. You know, sometimes, as I travel thru Second Life I like the surprises. It adds to the adventure! Sooo, click a link and explore. If a link could have easily fallen into more than one category, I put them where my mood took me.

A Furniture Note:
I have put a beautiful and unusual USA 1950's Paul McCobb Chaise Lounge with Arms in the shop. It has simple, clean lines and is textured in a light brown linen with cranberry trim. Feel free to stop by and take a look! Now I have my eyes on this stunning table with inlay..hmmm, bet I could pull that off.














A Personal Note:
On a personal note, I promise to stop picking on the guys in SL (even if the bad ones deserve it). Well, at least for the rest of this week I will.

Ranting - Damn Men!

Ok, I've had it - I'm done with the guys in sl.
What is wrong with being friends first? Guys just don't get it!!

Exxxxxx - Ex and friend. A very rare exception in sl.
Txxxxxxx - A player who only wants sex, shame he doesn't want a flirty friend.
Sxxxx - BDSM player who doesn't seem assertive enough to keep the conversation rolling. Maybe we could have been friends but I don't feel that's what he's looking for..and he doesn't dance, even when asked.
Dxxxx - New - we were friends for a few weeks. Assertive (I like that). We don't communicate well at all. Wish things could have been different.
Kxxxxx - He will make promises he can't keep and abandon you when you least expect it.

My point is, where the hell are the good guys?

The ones who want to be friends. The ones who want to know you...emotionally, intimately, sexually..and won't give up on you? The ones who will hold you while you vent..and laugh with you.

• I have tried live music events. All those guys seem to be partnered, have at least 3 ladies listed in their profiles, or are alts. Never date alts!!
  
• I have tried really nice men's stores. So... that's where all the hot gay guys are! Except for DE Designs (the Gor and Dom go there)
  
• Dance places attract the new guys (and no more newbs for me...ever!)

So I asked Txxxxxxx where to look for the good guys and he said I am looking in all the wrong places. He told me to try guy places like the Space Museum or porno places. ARG!! PORNO places? Suurrree....that's the kind of good guy i want.

If anyone has a suggestion - let me know. I'll check it out. But until then I am not coming out of my workshop.

Changes

Darn! Darn! Darn!

The estate manager says I need to remodel this weekend. Guess it can't be helped. I have found a beautiful structure that will give the store a residential feel to it. So wish me luck and please forgive the mess this weekend.

The new store design will reflect the more serious tone of my new projects but i will make room for some fun stuff too. I will also modify the dance floor and keep the little romantic park.

The items above are:
Paul Laszlo Desk USA 1950s
Paul Laszlo U.S.A Circa 1940's
Paul Laszlo U.S.A Circa 1940's/Gentle's Chest

I also wanted to post a picture of some of my most recent projects. I have taken a turn toward the more serious retro designs. The detail work is very important to me and I would love for you to drop by and take a closer look.

These are all reproductions of their era. So if an extra prim would catch just the right sort of curve, I put it in.

But I am also one not to waste prims. If a specific design element does not make or break the design, I will modify it to reduce the prim count.

Have a great weekend!

Fun and Bold

I thought it might be a good idea to show a picture or two of some of the things I have created. This little bar would be great for an ice cream, sandwich or coffee shop.

Every piece may be bought separately. And each stool has a different pose, so come check them out!

The Dreaded Profile

So last night was a restless night for me in SL. After starring at lounge fabric for way too long I decided to go to a live music concert or two and unwind.

As I looked about at the interesting attendees, I couldn’t help but look at their profiles. It’s not like I’m nosy or anything….really.

Come on people! Put something in your profiles. It is not that difficult.

But there may be a few things you should avoid in your profile.

These would include:

• Poetry – You should never have it in your profile. It makes us think you talk like that in your im’s. I’m sure your trying to be all deep and everything but it’s NOT a good conversation starter at all.
• Quoets – Better than poetry, but only if it’s funny.
• The most over used profile words ever used – “I won’t bite unless you want me to”. At any one concert with 40 people there, at least 5 of them use that line. No, no, no, it’s not funny.

There are few things I wish people WOULD put in their profiles:

* Their status!

• “I’m single” Dating is possible!
• “I just want to have fun and explore” No relationship necessary. They just want cyber.
• “I don’t date in sl” Never, nope, not going to happen. (Spouse over shoulder)
• “Can’t you see I have a partner?” Ouch! You forgot to look in their partner box.
• “OK, maybe not a partner but I am exclusive right now” Wishes their partner would commit.
• “I might date in a few weeks, but not today” A recent heartbreak, don’t rush them.
• “just looking for friends” This one does send out mixed signals, for those who like a challenge!

* Where you draw the line.

SL and RL should always remain separate
or
I am looking to date in RL and SL.

So if you can’t come up with something original for your profile just tell us your SL status and whether you want to keep your two lives separate. As for the rest of your 500 characters, just mention that you're profile challenged. Not only will we forgive you, but it makes us look twice at you. Gotta love the helpless.

Second Life Men

I figure this is sort of in the friend category.

Second Life Men are either:

1 Friends - REALLY just friends. They hear all my bitching:) In turn, they get bitchy (cuz they do) and I let them rant and rave. If they whine or throw a tantrum I like poking at them a bit. A rare friend will come along and he will be a flirty friend. Please see #4.

2 Lovers - WOW - What can you say about this group. Be careful to keep SL and RL very separate. No rl pictures, no rl phone numbers. Any crossover seems to be the beginning of the end of your sl relationship. If the guy is inexperienced, guide him gently (they have fragile egos). Everything is so accelerated in sl, most of these relationships tend to only last about 2 months. Enjoy every moment.

3 Players - They deserve their own Post. REALLY

4 Potential Lovers - (not to be confused with newbs). They are funny, romantic and i love to flirt with them. Sometimes it doesn’t work out……..but sometimes it does:))

5 Newbs - They are just as cute as they can be...you try to help them as much as you can. Yep! You get them skin and hair. If they weren't all so darn sensitve about their shapes a little tweaking of the sliders would sure go along way! Why help the new guys? Because there are sooo many pretty women in SL. Throwing a few good looking guys into the group might lessen the competion for me:))

The most difficult part about helping a new guy would be A) Convincing them you don't want to be a lover. B) Pushing them out of the nest. C) Knowing that in 3 - 4 weeks he will forget you. You would think that once the guy has a little sl experience from all the ladies out there they might drift back and say hello, but no...not gonna happen!

6 The ones that you can't have. They break your heart. This is the one you fell in love with. He could come from any of the above categories. For whatever reason, he decides to leave. Absolutely nothing you can do about it. Maybe a pretty avi distracted him or perhaps RL called. Who knows?